"Sunglasses at Night" 🅴

Jack (from the “I’m so Humble” piece) is sitting on a couch. His back is to the audience. It’s clear Jack and Harry have been fighting verbally. Harry is more tense and angry, Jack is cool and collected. Harry keeps trying to get Jack to physically turn around, but Jack won’t budge.

Harry: “I can’t believe it!”

Jack: Don’t get so bent out of shape about it.

Harry: Why not?

Jack: “‘Cause you got it made with the guy in the shades.” (pointing to himself with his thumbs)

Harry: “Oh no” you do not. Do not start this shit with me again.

Jack repositions himself so he’s lying on the couch with his feet in the air and his head leaning off the bottom cushions. Sunglasses on.

Harry: Take those off goddammit.

Jack: I will not. “I wear my sunglasses at night.”

Harry: That’s so disrespectful.

Jack: “So?”

Harry: “I can” barely look at you.

Jack: Great. “So I can” go back to ignoring you like usual?

Harry: What you did to that girl is so unacceptable.

Jack shrugs.

Harry: You “forget [her] name” all “while you [collected] your claim.” She’s a person Jack. She’s a really good person and you just decided that you could mess this up and treat her like dirt.

Jack: It’s fine. She doesn’t even know who I am.

Harry: (angrily) Tell me again why this is fine?

Jack: She hasn’t seen my face. “I wear my sunglasses at night.” She never saw my face. If we see each other on the street, she’ll never know the difference. “So I can” get away with it with everyone.

Harry: (mocking) “So I can” get away with it. You’re trash, Jack. Look me in the eyes. “See the light that’s right before my eyes.”

Jack: Can’t. I have my sunglasses on.

Harry: Tell me you’re going to be better to people.

Jack: How do you know she’s any better? That she wasn’t just using me?

Harry: I don’t. I’ll take a wild guess that she isn’t though because she has asked about seeing you, and earth to Jack, we have mutual friends.

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